Faithful in the Fray

I started a new job back in April. It was a hard decision to leave the company I had been at for the last four years, but when opportunity knocks, sometimes you need to answer.

I was nervous leaving the comfort of my cubical, the predictability of each day, and the relationships I had made, but the scent of a fresh start was almost intoxicating.

When I started my new job there was mention of a few training’s that were going to take place, but only one was on my immediate horizon.

Well, fast forward to my first week of work and I was given the opportunity to go on three different training trips, all places I’ve never been before.

Now, most of you would find this shocking, but I don’t really like to be alone, alone. Now, I like going into my bedroom to read while Jeremy watches TV but I’m not actually alone, ya know what I mean? Anyways, these trips meant that I would be alone while I traveled and then most evenings once the training’s were over.

I could’ve looked at this scenario a couple different ways. I could’ve flown in, got my rental, found my hotel, and camped until the next day, or I could’ve created an adventure out of the whole thing.

I chose the latter.

My first trip had me flying into Omaha and driving the hour to Lincoln, Nebraska.

It was beautiful.

And full of corn.

I checked into my hotel and hit the ground running. I pulled out my phone and found a sandwich shop about half a mile away and decided to walk. Typically I do anything to avoid physical activity as I’m not in the best shape of my life, so the walk was very unusual for me.

But you know what?

I loved it! I got to feel the wind in my hair, I got sunglasses marks on my nose, my tennis shoes and shorts combo were out of this world cute, and I was thriving.

After lunch I walked back to the hotel and made my way a bit further away to a sunken garden where I explored a hidden gem in the heart of Lincoln. I prayed my way through and had just enough time to drive over to the Capital to join in on a tour and take the Willie Wonka and the Chocolate Factory elevator to the 14^th floor rotunda where you could see for miles.

It was a beautiful day. And I spent it by myself!

Many of you reading this know that I’ve been in counseling for the last two years and something I’ve been learning about is who I truly am, deep down to my core.

Hidden behind layers of insecurities is this woman that longs for adventure and flying by the seat of her pants, yet life and trauma have caused her to stay buried deep down for fear of failure or looking stupid.

Not anymore. It’s why my list of 25 things for my 25^th birthday was so important to me. And I’ve knocked off so many more of the items than I thought I would. I still have about six weeks left until I come up with 26 more things to do this upcoming year!

My next trip was just last week to Tampa. I’ve been to Orlando before with my parents, but never down to Florida by myself. I had heard amazing things about the beaches in Clearwater, so I arrived, got my car, and headed straight towards the beach. I made it an hour later after driving over beautiful bridges and couldn’t believe my eyes—it was beautiful.

I FaceTimed with Jeremy and Maizie to show them where I was at and afterwards I sat and soaked in the sunset. Sure I may have felt a bit strange in my shorts, t-shirt, and jacket on a beach filled with people in their bathing suits, but this was my journey and I was proud to be living it.

The next day after my training was over I drove back to Clearwater, but this time to the Marine Aquarium. I haven’t seen the movies Dolphin Tale 1 or 2, but it still was such a neat experience. Seeing the animals and hearing the stories of how they came to be there was so educational, and something I genuinely wanted to learn about.

Towards the end of my time there I called Maiz and asked her what kind of stuffed animal she wanted me to get her and of course my kid said the Octopus… so that’s what I got her. She may have been slightly terrified of it, but enjoys playing with it during the day time.

I’m proud of myself for not missing moments on these trips.

I’m proud that I got out of my comfort zone and spent time riding with the windows down (and AC up because momma don’t play with the heat) and singing at the top of my lungs.

I ate dinner alone at a restaurant and caught up on my reading.

I was intentional at making sure I practiced a different form of self-care than usual, when in all actuality, I normally don’t practice any at all.

Next week I have my last trip for a while. I’m heading to Portland, Oregon, and I couldn’t be more excited.

Don’t miss out on life just because your insecurities are making you feel silly. Tell your insecurities to go away and LIVE. I’m saying yolo a lot lately which is so 2013 of me, but for real.

Live your best life.